I wasn't sure...

I'd remember how to post as I signed into my blog tonight. It's been too long since my last post.

It actually been a while since I've written anything for the public eye. Similar to my friend Alana, I've had all these ideas rolling around in my head that I haven't been able commit to a coherent writing effort.

The one thing I have pondered posting for several weeks now is my "25 things about me" list. I was 'tagged' on FaceBook (about one hundred times). My initial reaction was NO way, but I finally succumbed to pier pressure and wrote what I thought to be a well thought out, heartfelt list of 25 things I wouldn't mind people knowing about me.

My list consisted of 'common' knowledge, my personal view of myself, and some surprises to those close to me. I too was surprised. Surprised by the fact that people saw me as putting myself down. It bothered me that people saw my list as negative rather than transparent. Come to think of it, prospective counts for a whole lot doesn't it? Perspective isn't accurate, but it caused me to delete my list from FB and save it for future posterity.

One friend posted a comment after several others tried to convince me I was "being to hard on myself." Her comment described accurately why some points on my list might have seemed like 'put downs'. She captured my intent better than I could. Lisa writes: "I can see how some thought you were putting yourself down. I guess that is the "hazard" of the random list...you get a snippet of a thought with no other context. What I find from you is that you do much more soul searching than most people. You are so self-aware, knowing your strengths and weaknesses. Of course, it is the weaknesses that come out in the list as something that needs improvement. I love this about you. You make me search more deeply within myself. You inspire me. I love you!"


Still as I write I'm trying to decide if I want to post the list, and do I want to revise it if I post it?

Alright, I've exhumed the list (I still haven't decided if I will edit it, even that will be a surprise to me as I reread the list):

1. I'm a mustard girl. I like it on hot dog buns (no dog) with chili, cheese, relish & sauerkraut, hamburgers, sandwiches, onion rings and eggs. Yes, I said eggs (you can thank my grandfather for the eggs).
2. I'd love to live on the upper eastside of NYC for at least 1 year (with an option for an additional 4 years at my discretion.)
3. I love spicy food.
4. Mexican food is da bomb diggity (Wesley made me add diggity)!
5. I'd be a professional student, if I could find someone to finance it.
6. I wish I were a better photographer, singer, listener.
7. One day I will learn to play piano, tap dance, and walk a marathon.
8. I'd travel anywhere. "Amazing Race" come-and-get me!
9. I missed my calling as a detective.
10. There is an unwritten book inside me waiting for inspiration (and all these little people to leave home.)
11. I was once a good cook, before I was relegated to fare from the likes of chicken nuggets, mac & cheese, and pizza. (In truth, I'm still a good cook, but it's not as enjoyable right now because the boys are difficult to please.)
12. I don't like to talk on the phone. Texts and e-mails are the only way to go. Oh, and FB all the way baby!
13. God answered my prayer- I didn't want anything to do with girls! Except dress them and do Girl Scouts (and our local, annual dance recital thingy that every mom in the area is in hubbub about in spring.)
14. I expected a lot more of myself than I have accomplished thus far in my life. (You see-- I wish I were the Proverbial woman on caffeine. I could then accomplish all she accomplished, but I'd do it in ONE day.)
15. I'm not as sympathetic as I'd like to be.
16. I take being a mom too serious. I don't laugh enough with my kids.
17. I love to play games.
18. I'd do anything in my power to help a friend if they asked.
19. I wish I had more confidence in my abilities.
20. I cry at everything. Most of the time I don't like that I'm emotional, but there are times I believe it serves me well.
21. I don't like Christmas, except for the cards, parties and Christmas breakfast with my kids. Gift giving is out of control and overrated!
22. Thanksgiving is my favorite holiday.
23. I identify with characters from "Sea biscuit", "Wicked" and "Because of Winn-Dixie."
24. I make fast friends, but I let very few people really know me. (Case in point, putting a list of 25 things out there and being seen as 'putting myself down.)
25. A good glass of lemonade on a hot sunny day can refresh the soul like nothing else.

So there you have it, slightly revised with some additions and subtractions. Blatant additions are in italic, while subtractions have disappeared into thin cyber-delete.

In all fairness, several people posted comments on FB identifying with points on my list. Not everyone saw my list as negative.